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I write about sex a lot. I also talk about it a lot. I don't just do these things because I am a pervert (although I am), I do them because it is my job, and it's one I take seriously. Well, as seriously as anyone can take a job that often finds them researching phrases like "cute butt plug" on Google.
Because May is National Masturbation Month, I've been talking and writing about sex even more so than usual, especially with marketing and PR reps who are eager for me to talk about their clients who are selling things like knock-off fleshlights, penis numbing cream, and jingle bell nipple clamps.
By and large, I don't wind up writing about a lot of the stuff that comes my way, because unless it's interesting to me or I think it's going to change the way you have sex and orgasm forever, I'm not going to waste your time or my time writing them up. I am not the home shopping network, I'm a journalist — of the sex-having variety.
Which is why I am telling you that if you try no other "
2. Once you have a vibrator, it's time to get to know it.
Before you start using your vibrator during sex, you should start off by using it on yourself. This way, you'll know exactly how to use a vibrator it for maximum pleasure.
Start by turning it on and playing around with the settings so that you can get an idea of how intense it vibrates. If you're already turned on, then you'll notice how pleasurable it feels just holding it in your hand while it's vibrating.
3. Use it to bring yourself to orgasm.
You should find somewhere quiet, where you aren't going to be disturbed. Make sure you're relaxed and comfortable and suitably turned on. Different people need to do different things to turn themselves on. Some need to watch porn, some need to read some erotica or a romance novel, while others need nothing more than their imagination. The key is doing what you need to do to get aroused. Don't rely solely on the vibrator to turn you on.
When you find yourself aroused, it's time to turn on your vibrator on a low setting, then run it gently over your body. Don't feel that you need to go straight to your most sensitive regions with it just yet — instead, pay close attention to what feels enjoyable and pleasurable.
You'll notice that different areas of your body respond differently to it. In certain areas, it will feel too powerful and it will be more irritating than pleasurable. This is totally normal, all you need to do is turn down the intensity, while other areas will require a lot of vibrations to feel enjoyable.
4. Experiment and focus on what feels good without worrying about reaching orgasm.
Eventually, bring the vibrator down to your groin area and start running it over yourself and pay close attention to what feels best. In a way, you will now be teasing yourself with the vibrator. If you then want to increase the pleasure, you can start bringing the vibrator closer and closer to your clitoris. Many women report that direct contact with the vibrator on their clitoris is painful, so you may want hold it a little bit away from any sensitive areas.
If you follow all these techniques, reaching orgasm should be incredibly simple.
5. Add a vibrator to your and your partner's sex life.
A vibrator is a great way to keep sex hot, especially if you usually have trouble reaching orgasm through penetration alone.
Just keep it beside your bed so that you can quickly grab it to help yourself out while having sex.
Using the vibrator on yourself is the obvious choice, but don't forget that you can also use it on your man too during sex or foreplay. You can gently run it over any part of his genitals and he will enjoy it. But, don't be surprised if you find your man climaxing in less than a minute when you use it on the top part of his penis.
One of the best positions to use your vibrator on yourself during sex is doggie style as you will usually have one free hand, but do experiment with other positions too to see what you personally enjoy the most.
6. Use your vibrator to put on a show for your man.
Remember, guys are visual. That's why they like porn after all! So, turn the lights right down and just do what you normally do when you're on your own.
You might find that your man doesn't feel like he's "enough" for you if you are using a vibrator during sex. So if you can tell that your man is feeling weird about it, just let him know that it's not him. Explain to him that the ability to reach orgasm during sex varies massively from woman to woman. Let him know that you've always had trouble and that the vibrator is just something to help you "get over the line."
Some guys can be pretty dumb about this, even after you explain it to him, so don't expect this to work with every guy.
The last important point to make on learning how to use a vibrator is that you need to make sure that you don't become dependent on it. If you use your vibrator every single night, you may find yourself able to orgasm only when using a vibrator ...
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